10 Canine Commandments

10-canine-commandmentsImage source: Tumblr via Reddit

Very well said. I think these canine commandments should be read and understood by anyone who is thinking of getting a dog. It is both a responsibility and a tremendous privilege. Dogs are awesome.


  1. why people feel the need to bash things on the internet is beyond me. yes, you can have your opinion and feel this is a stupid article, say it and leave. don’t come back to justify yourself and try to start something over the damn internet with people you don’t even know. or maybe that’s why you do it, because it doesn’t matter to you. well, me being a dog owner who actually gives a care, i found this to be very touching because i know i love my dog very much. so all you heartless people can go spread your shit somewhere else so the people who actually take something from this can have an adult conversation. and who uses “gay” anymore when they really mean stupid. go find a dictionary.

  2. or dont buy a fucking dog. go out and meet humans.
    they cant talk you know…

  3. Yeah, I’m with Greg. This whole thing reads “I’m alone so I bought an animal for company”.

  4. Wangmaster says:

    I have a chocolate Labrador with the same damn collar. He’s awesome and he goes everywhere with me. This made me want to pick him up and hug him. So i did. Nice.

  5. @truth: Don’t feed the trolls.

    And now I want to hug my dog too! This reminded me of the dog I had a few years ago, and how I held his head while the life left his eyes. Such a sad and beautiful moment… anyone that has ever had the privilege of loving and being loved by a dog can relate to this. Truly beautiful.

  6. It makes perfect sense that a lot of people love their pets (mainly dogs) more than real people. It’s called UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. You can beat the SHIT out of a dog and it will love you just the same. Scold it all you want and it will continue to try and please you. There is a reason, I think, that Dog is God backwards ;).

  7. O Brave New World! That has such people in it!
    Good on ya humanity… Scum of the earth, that’s what you people are.

  8. Greg, why do you buy a dog? So you can have something smaller than you to hit? If you don’t take care of your “animal” then don’t get one.

  9. Greg, you sound very angry. Someone has hurt you, that comes through very clearly. Sometimes a good dog can help get you through that anger, by just loving you for who you are in that moment. It sounds weird, but lots of people have had that experience. I hope you do too.

  10. Dogs are good, but horses are better… and harder to understand!

  11. Picture is shopped. I can tell by some of the pixels and having seen a few shops in my time.

  12. I read this. And I agree with it. I raise dogs and it might surprise some people that I go through agony choosing the people to adopt my puppies into their families. It is because of me that these puppies exist. I chose to breed the dogs — and it doesn’t take long to find out in conversation who is a committed dog owner and who is not. The same people who would throw out a dog when it is “too much trouble” would abandon a human as well.ove a child over to children’s aid. No dog of mine ends up on the garbage heap. And when it is time to release them from a painful body, I hold them until they are gone. Every time, I feel my heart is being ripped from my body but I do it again for the next one because it is the right thing to do.

    And for those people who say it’s only a dog — may I say that every day I wish I were the person my dog thinks I am. And the longer I know some people, the more I prefer my dog.

  13. There’s always some troll or moron ruining every comment section. i think that is an excellent poster and it should be on the wall of every kindergarten/creche/pre-school etc. so people learn it at an early age.

  14. I had a golden retriever and it was adorable dog. This reminds me how i miss him..

  15. I just got my first puppy on new years day. I already believe and understand all of these, nothing is more important to me than my Althea.

  16. captain obvious says:

    11. Take me for a walk and pick up my poo with a plastic covered hand

  17. bill o reilly says:

    I will hit my dog as much as I want and maybe even hit your dog when you’re not looking and there’s not a goddamn thing you can do about it! Maybe even hit some women too…

  18. Bill o Reilly what an idiot you are, I hope someone hits you, preferably with a train and puts you out of your miserable existence. You demonstrate the worse of humanity. That is all troll.

  19. 10 Trollish Commandments:

    1. My life is way too long. Any lack of response from you is painful to me. Please feed me.

    2. Give me some of your time! Can’t you understand I want you to feed me?

    3. Turn your angst and anger on me. It’s crucial to my well being.

    4. Stay VERY angry with me since you cannot punish me. Yeah, sure, you have work and friends… but I need you to be MY entertainment!

    5. Spit venom at me! Wish death upon me! Call me names! Just don’t ignore me!

    6. Be aware I’ll keep zipping back here to get any crumbs of attention! Please don’t forget me!

    7. Remember before you lash out at me… that’s my only goal. It’s all I can accomplish. I’m begging you: FEED ME!

    8. This one is pretty much the same….hmm.

    9. Don’t let my comments grow old!

    10. I refuse to journey out of my mother’s basement! I need your feedback to help me feel like I have a life!


  20. michael vick says:

    win the crowd and you will win your freedom.

  21. special Ed says:

    arguing on the internet is like running in the special Olympics. whether you win or not…you’re still a retard. but dogs are awesome and anyone who abuses a dog in any way deserves to get a 9mm hollowpoint thru the head

  22. Dog Man says:

    Um… In regards to Number 6 – Dogs never forget…. yeah they do.

    Dog pisses on carpet while you’re out.
    You return, shout at dog.
    Dogs looks at you as if to say: “WTF?”

    It’s already forgot!

    As for the a majority of those, it seems like a way to let dogs off with punishments.

  23. Korean Pete says:

    Looks delicious.

  24. Making sure to follow these commandments.

  25. sad and lonely says:

    i hate stumble for bringing me here. i just put my puppy to sleep yesterday morning. she had been my best friend since i was 7, and everything in this post reminds me of her :'(

  26. hope you’re at peace my little girl ๐Ÿ™‚

  27. I want to fuck a dog so bad right now.

  28. If you want to improve your life, then get a dog. If you want to make your life worse, then troll on the internet.

  29. Allan, idk. My lab makes that face all the time. Quit trollin’.

  30. Great! love it ๐Ÿ™‚

  31. Do not get a dog for the company, get a dog for a companion, they will give their life to be your companion, and they ask so little in return

  32. And remember to make adoption your first option! Shelters have so many wonderful dogs of all sizes that need loving homes. And believe me, they will NEVER forget that you saved them. I rescued a little mutt 2 years ago and he’s my partner in crime.We like to chase crows together ๐Ÿ™‚

  33. This dog looks just like one I used to enter in fights. Recently, his life was taken in battle. Seeing this just made me want to take the opportunity to recognize a truly great fighter; the dog fighting world will never be the same to me RIP Cookie.

  34. Thou shalt not Antropomorphise animals, for, if so, thou shalt be known as “a douchebag”.

  35. realtruth says:

    stupid & gay

  36. You go truth Im with you! Ive always believed that animals and children are the most innocent beings on the earth. For the none dog people why are you on this site? You could always go to dogfights,crush,kill and destroy.com and bang your drum therre!!

  37. snoeklepel says:


  38. Something tells me molliesmom doesn’t know the meaning of antropomorphise…

  39. KittehPawz says:

    I can’t read them. ๐Ÿ™ But! I have 2 dogs: A Black Lab and a Papillion named Izzy(short for Izzabell) and Ginger.

  40. Show my photos here:

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    to โ€œreturn the favorโ€.I’m attempting to find things to enhance my site!I suppose
    its ok to use some of your ideas!!

  42. Humans rape your children and rob you blind. You should have seen the look on my attacker’s face when he entered my home by force and saw my new attack trained mastwieler. I have found in life, you get what you give with the exception in dealings with humans which is the only place you find evil. To the mothers of fatherless children: Let the preceding posts bear witness to you. Give your Son that dog he asked for before evil gets him. I wish my husband’s mother had taught him how to treat humans with these 10 commandments. Go Roosevelt’s Big Stick Policy.

  43. Some dick heads on here.I love this poem.I have no kids so my dogs my world&some ppl obviously have swinging bricks instead of a heart. Humans arnt always that nice tho… Yr an example.

  44. Gay means happy. Sad ppl out there. Grow up,go update ya status ur so pathetic lol .probably some geeky cat lover with no friends who’s life is so sad that they got nothing better to do than b negative. LOSERS LOL


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